Memories :
( BabyBoomers:
The existential dream
All you need is love....
Beatles 1967
Mathieu. ecoutes-tu?)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
There was something about the sea
And the stillness of that night,
and the million moonlike minnows
that crest the waves then hide from sight.
Just the sigh and the hush
of their forward and back,
And the breeze like the touch
of warm breath on my neck.
But there's a stone in my heart
where a memory should be,
And all that talk I remember
of how we need to be free,
And a face full of grief
like the salt of the sea.
Now in my head you're in my arms,
And we're standing in that sea,
And I hear that whispered promise still
That only love can make us free.
There was a stillness in the night
and the whisper from the sea,
And the stone was growing darker
and my wrist's a mystery.
And in the shadow of the trees
where I saw you kiss his lips
The part of me that's dying's
flowing through my fingertips
And the music that was playing
is just a dischord in my head
And the song is just a litany,
a litany for the dead
I am sorry....was all she said
So just hold me in your arms
And baptise me in the sea
And tell me - is it love
That one day will set us free?
And now the dancing has stopped
on the path lit by the moon
And that distant seagull's cry
still sounds lost and out of tune
Like that broken violin
on that August afternoon
When the paths were mapped and charted
in these stars above this dune.
And if that life was never broken
and those tears were never shed
Then those words were never spoken
and Paul was never dead.
And if the sea could wash my sins away,
And the sun could cleanse my soul,
I could love with all my heart again,
And there wouldnt be this stone.
So long ago now that memory of me
where the mountains plunge down headlog
In their rush to meet the sea
And the lime white cottage in it's crescent of trees
And the peat and the salt and the seagull memories.
And his eisel in the corner
and his paintings round the wall
And his dog that loved you instantly
and came to your first call
And yet the foolish wish remains
to go back and change it all,
So the ghosts that haunt me now
might not be born at all,
What final stupid treachery
is etched upon this stone
To wish the world away
just so I can be alone
Ok. Where to begin? First,- it's likely that no one is actually reading this.
The probability is that I'm now speaking to an algorithm in a machine,
if so,- well hello machine! But, if a sentient being is visiting,
let me say welcome and I hope you find something interesting on this site.
If any CS50 staff are reading this then, -a big thank you
for the work that you have all done/are doing to make this course possible.
It's been great course and so far I'm really enjoying it. Thanks to all
for providing me with this wonderful route map for my continuing journey
of curiousity.
So, since you've landed here I guess I should give you
some background about myself. (You'd probably expect that - given the page is called
'about me'.)
I decided to embark upon the CS50 course, not as a means to a career but merely to
indulge the pleasure I get from computers and computer technology in general.
This has been a continuing fascination for me from about circa 1980 when a
friend and I bought a Sinclair ZX computer kit (awesome- 1Kb RAM - 4Kb ROM)
and thus began my fascination. This kit had just come on the market as a part of
the then nascent -' available for all' - home computing technology.
I imagine you have already guessed that I'm not a kid. Lol. In fact, I was born
on the 30th of September 1948 and grew up in the back streets of Belfast Northern Ireland,
so a swift calculation will tell that I am almost 72 years of age.
For a little more context I'll tell you that, (largely because I ran away
from home at the age of 15), I have no formal academic qualifications whatsoever.
During this escapade I found jobs picking potatoes for ugly french farmers,
pearl diving, (co-workers euphemism for dish washing in cafes and restaurants),
hitch hiking around Europe, and generally being young and free, and enjoying the company of
girls with names like Yvette and Anna-Maria. But I digress. When I did return
home to my understandably anxiety stricken parents, I did complete the courses I'd been studying
(loosely) at high school but, study and I were mismatched. So although I later
attended evening classes to, (barely), obtain, higher Certs. in Maths and English
(my two favourite subjects at which I was reasonably profeciency), - I
found money a much more attractive proposition than years more study. (Falling asleep in
most classes after a day's work didn't help my grades! btw)
The Sinclair ZX80 was also my first introduction to programming languages in the form of
'BASIC' and although I have
indulged in various programming projects in all the years since,- it has always been in a
haphazard and informal way
and peripheral to my main life requirements of simply finding a way to survive and provide for the needs of me and
my family.
Just reminiscing. At that time, if I renemeber correctly,
I was then practicing 'existencialism lite', - ie., my own
watered down version of that philosophy....(perhaps it can't really be anything else!).
Anyway, I had read 'Nausea' by Jean-Paul Sartre,
then his trilogy 'The Roads to Freedom'. This was dramatised by the BBC and the haunting
theme that accompanied each episode is still something I listen to. (if you wish you
can too.
).
So anyway, I have reached that point in the CS50 course that requires me to complete this particular
Project. It has been a journey let me say but still, a labour of fun despite the mamy, many frustrations.
I began this problem set with a concept and, armed only with Curiosity and dogged
determination, I set out to make the concept work. Given that I was a virtual newbie and required to
comply with the specs that were laid out for the project, - using HTML Bootstrap and CSS only
- (self-imposed non JavaScript), it was certainly challenging! Had I been less ambitious I could
certainly have completed the project far sooner and more easily, but I
wanted to create something a little different, and for me, the fun was in the challenge of doing that!
Every failure (of which there were many, many) and every head banging frustration served to teach me more, which
after all, was the name of the game for me. I had the time, and as I said, it was an indulgence. Every page of HTML
provided it's own unique challenges.